child.

it's 1:06 am and i am sitting in a large circular room by myself. a rotunda. oh, so rotund.

i am going through my facebook notes.
and i wish right now more than ever that i could go back and meet my former self, little freshman lindsay, and just hug her. i would hug her and hold her and tell her that pain is on the way. but so is unbelievable joy. and accomplishment. i would tell her that she is capable of anything. she is capable of pushing away the ones she loves the most. she is capable of healing. she is capable of things people will tell her over and over she cannot do.

more than all of that, i would tell her that she's beautiful and loved. i would tell her that it's not her, it's the world. the culture is to blame. it's nothing you did wrong, child. none of this is your fault. smile. please, smile. it will all get better soon.